assurance of the unknown

I have no job. Let's just get that out of the way right now. It should be made clear to everyone who reads this blog that it is being composed by a man who does nothing for a living. At least, at the moment. I can testify that it is very difficult to get prospective employers to move swiftly on the hiring process during the holiday season, especially churches. Since I have resigned myself to believe that nothing in this life is going to happen "normally" it comes as no shock that my present situation should ensue. And now the ice is getting thinner, the road is narrowing, the net is filling with holes. Choose your cliche.

And today clave has the nerve to say (with a straight face), "You'll be fine. Everything's gonna be alright." Imagine the nerve of someone who could stand directly in front of me, knowing all that has been going on, understand the mounting tension of our situation and utter words so fundamentally and completely. . . . . .true. In fact, the profundity of his statement so strongly sounds the gong of truth and promise that it is actually frightening. Frightening to know that God is waiting to act at precisely the perfect moment, perhaps just to show off a bit that he is God and I am not. For some reason, he gets a kick out of doing that (truth be told, I tend to like it too. . .um, when it's over).

It strikes me that faith is so much easier to hold on to when you talk about it rather than when you are forced to live it. I guess that's why we overuse language of God's "testing" of our faith. Wait. . .testing? If faith isn't faith until it is lived then how can every time we are in a position to live it we give it a negative connotation of being tested as though this is some unwarranted, uncalled-for, obscene pop quiz during third period? We are called to a life of faith, not a life of faith-directed dialogue. So this is what faith really is. And clave's comments to me were so certain about a future that has not happened. Then it hits me.

Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.
Hebrews 11:1

This is faith. And faith becomes a worldview by which believers live. Thus, life without faith is not living since we have been called to live by faith. The two are inseparable. Living requires faith; faith demands living.

I believe that it is time for us all to move past this notion that any challenge, any trouble, any difficulty, any actual required effort is some animated essay contest by which we either pass or fail with Professor God in order to see if we're acceptable in his sight or not. Instead, let us just live. After all, the ice is getting thinner, the road is narrowing, the net is filling with holes. . .right where he wants me.

cut to rich:
"After all, He had a certain fondness for sparrows and did not consider their care and feeding beneath the dignity of God - though God's care and dignity (Jesus would assert) is beyond the comprehensiveness of men." *




*Rich Mullins, "Considering the Lilies" in The World as I Remember It (Sisters, OR: Multnomah, 2004), 32.