Have you ever noticed that sixty percent of the Psalms are laments? Seriously, well over half of the Bible's own "hymn book" consists of poetry written with a bit of woe-is-me going on. Many times the psalmist speaks of his unwanted, unwarranted position, of how his enemies are triumphing over him, and questioning how God could allow his anointed one to suffer. Of course, I should also point out that in the midst of all of this there exists a firm resolve that the Almighty will ultimately triumph in the face of whatever forces dare oppose him.
It has also come to my attention that a good percentage of this blog has been in the style of lament. As both of my readers know. . . . . .this site has been driven by the journey on which I find myself, as all good theology should be. For I do not believe theology can exist without the everchanging real-life experiences of individuals who struggle with faith. By referencing a struggle I am not suggesting that one needs to continually question their belief system on a fundamental (superficial) level. The struggle of faith that produces our best thoughts of God comes from the wrestling in which we find ourselves pushing and being pushed in the night by a Creator who refuses to leave us as we are. It's a Jacob thing.
Given my present circumstances I can say that I am struggling - indeed, growing - in my faith. This is because I have a pre-existing faith on which I can build. A faith not in church, people, money, status, government, school, information, gadgets, music, military, pastors, jobs, youth, elderly, leaders, ideas, or self. A faith in God alone.
Here's the big question: A faith in God is a faith in what, exactly?
Let me explain. . .when someone professes faith in God, what exactly is the expectation of that faith? For all of those individuals who have repeatedly told me that God has something in mind for my situation or that God is at work to bring about good for me, how is this supposed to happen? Am I to believe that when I pray for a job to come available that God is somehow going to override the freedom of another individual (or group) just so that my prayers can be answered? Although I would suppose that many would cringe at such a thought, I do believe it is the most natural conclusion at which we find ourselves when we evaluate our own Godspeak.
Or does my faith say that God will influence those who are connected by his Spirit to do that which is in his will, therefore all we need to do is pray that all individuals will be open to his leading? If we follow this path then is faith relegated back to faith in individuals rather than in God? Where exactly is the faith being directed? Perhaps a quick answer would be that one's prayers ought to be that God's Spirit would be so compelling that individuals would be drawn in such a way as to find it irresistable. But that sounds too Calvinist for me and doesn't really seem to answer the question in the first place.
Many questions. Few answers.
I'm not trying to run the universe. . .I'm having enough trouble just getting through my section of it.
I am still confident of this:
I will see the goodness of the LORD
in the land of the living.
~Psalm 27:13
3 comments:
A few months ago it occured to me that I trust in God becuase he is only good and can only do good. As a person "growing up in the church" as they say, I have always heard that you are just supposed to trust in God, have faith in God, believe in God becuase it was the right thing to do, but it never really occured to me until recently that it is really just that just as I trust this chair to hold me up, I trust God do "work everything together for good" becuase He really wants the best for me. As to some young insight into your job situation, I think God rearranges people to fit his plans in his perfect time. Last year, thre was a youth pastor at my church who was an amazing person simply feel called by God somewhere else- so he went. At the same time, a number of other teachers and mentors left my life and I was devistated-- until I put those people in God's hand and trusted that he knew what he was doing and trusting that he had a reason and was bringing better things into my life. And it has been amazing as I look at the peopl he brought into my life as a result of those absences. I don't think that God is going to do something mean to someone else who looses the job you get, but he is taking each of you to better places in life. We trust God becuase we know he can only do good.
Thanks for your comments. heidi, I wan't to say that you are always encouraging and have many great insights which are always great to read. I think that you're exactly right on a number of points and do not wish to dismiss anything that you've posted here. I do feel, however, that you're response shows how difficult of an issue this has become for me as I do not think that your response gets us out of the quandry of faith in others as we still must wait for the individual to respond to God's will in order for his 'rearrangment' to occur.
Let me further say that this is a rather difficult issue with which I am dealing. Not that I do not trust or find my faith lacking, but that here is a theological quesiton that cuts deep into how we live our lives. I am honestly stumped here, which only compels me forward to find him.
It just dawned on me that the last line before the Psalm would make an awesome Christian bumper sticker. And it is so me to support the Jesus Junkstore industry!
Rock, rock on!!
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